Zero Tolerance has become Intolerable

I read about a girl who said "that's so gay" when responding to something that she thought was stupid. Saying it resulted in formal disciplinary action against her from the school and a lawsuit based on zero tolerance of gay slurs.

What happened to having a teacher call her aside and saying "you know, I heard what you said and here's why it's not right to say that..... and why we expect you never to say such a derogatory phrase again" Then, if it happens again - something more formal...but less than a lawsuit.

I was just thinking about zero tolerance the other day. Several times this year my daughters have complained about teachers who punish a whole class based on the actions of one child - especially in a case where the teacher didn't actually see a whole incident, or doesn't know exactly whose at fault, and they don't want to accept the story or explanation of any one child.

So - while I try to support the teachers by explaining that they are trying to teach a lesson in accountability for your actions and how your actions can impact others. I explain that the idea of punishing a whole class for one childs misbehavior lets that child know that not only did he do wrong, but he caused a problem for all of his friends and classmates as well. The classmates in turn hopefully learn that if they act out, the repercussions will go beyond just their own punishment. Hopefully that will prevent it happening again.

In truth though I felt more like the teacher was copping out. He/she was teaching all of the kids that all of the kids are not worth trusting. One child speaks out, gets called on the carpet, he blames another kid, everyone gets in trouble. Those that go to the teacher to try to explain that he's misunderstood what happened, or that this or that child was not involved, are abruptly shut down and told "I don't want to hear it."

What does that tell our children? How many truths are teachers missing by not giving the children the benefit of the doubt or by not listening to the kids who truly are standing up for themselves and trying to prove that they have done no wrong? How hopeless does the child feel when he or she realizes that it's pointless to talk to the teacher? And how does that affect the children in the future when they have a legitimate problem that the teacher could solve, but the student feels it would be pointless or they'd just get in trouble?

I thought my kids were a bit out of that zero tolerance loop because they did not go to public school and so were not governed by the all powerful god of Political Correctness. Can't have "Christmas" break - only "Winter" break. Can't speak of Easter. Can't say prayers. Can't talk about God or religion. Can't accidentally mispeak while not understanding the full impact of your words - essentially no free speech if it might possibly hurt someones feelings even inadvertently.

But with this latest batch of punishments for the class I'm feeling a turn. I'm feeling that perhaps with the influx of new teachers who have been trained under the public political system, the tide is turning to an atmosphere similar to the intolerance of public school.

I know that my issue is a small one, but they all start somewhere. I'm just tired of the whole zero tolerance thing.

Someone says gay and gets suspended. Someone says retarded and gets expelled. A five year old accidentally puts his plastic knife in his pocket instead of the garbage after lunch and gets arrested!!!

Come on grown ups. how about a little common sense? How about a conversation?